On S/V Fawkes my husband is the Captain and I’m the Admiral. Or so we of the fairer sailors like to think. In reality we’re partners in this adventure we’ve embarked upon. A constant on our boat is if one says no, than the answer is no. We respect that one of us has reached our risk limit and it usually means we opt for safe harbors.
When a storm hit un-expectantly and a very old sail ripped to shreds in the middle of a night passage. The Captain wanted to go forward to bring it down and I said no. In my mind it was worth the flapping and nerve biting hours sitting safely in the cockpit, versus losing him overboard in the storm. When daylight flitted on the horizon I was comfortable with the risk.
Wife, mother, sailor, friend, writer, blogger, and the list goes on. If you’re anything like me, I put on so many hats, I sometimes lose site of the role I’m really meant to play at any one time. We forget to tend ourselves.
Now, I’m not suggesting we be selfish, but the best way we can serve the different aspects of our lives is to take care of ourselves first. That might mean filling our creative well, it might mean getting physically activity or eating right. Anyway you look at it, the biggest role we play is taking care of ourselves before we can be anything else to anyone.
Women have a harder time remembering ourselves. I know I did in the throes of raising and educating my children, taking care of the house and making my husband’s life just a bit easier. I lost myself for a time. Cruising has put some of my roles into perspective. Balance is the name of the game. I have the advantage of weather forcing us to stop and wait, though I don’t always see it as an advantage when I want to get to the next destination.
I’ve learned to read more, pick up my knitting needles and start a new project or play in the galley and create something new. More importantly I’ve learned to spend more time with the people I love, really listen to them instead of just anticipate their needs. We play board games, we watch movies and just share some quiet time. I think it’s made me a better wife, mother and friend.
I still catch myself with idle time thinking I should be doing something. There will always be something to do, but does it involve filling my well, so I’m more capable of filling my roles?
How about you? Do you feel as if you’re in a race and can’t stop? Does your engine run on empty?
My newest role includes blogging and I’ve found some wonderful support in a community of bloggers and recently 3 – That’s three of my blogging buddies from Kristen Lamb’s class Blogging to Build Brand gave me a Liebster Blog Award. I am humbled and awed by this wonderful community of bloggers.
The first Award came from Diana Murdock’s Blog who has an inspiring blog that wraps around her own life that everyone can relate.
Finally, the third Award comes from Bridgett Booth – Somewhere in Time . She’s a young adult writer and history teacher with something for every age.
I am overwhelmed by the blog love showered upon me. Thanks ladies! Please check out their blogs, you’ll be glad you did.
So, here’s the fine print on receiving the Liebster Blog Award: Winners of a Liebster must:
1. Post the award on your blog and show thanks to the blogger who gave you the award by linking back to them via the award graphic
2. Reveal your top five picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog or send them a shout out on Twitter.
3. Bask in the love from the most supportive people on the Internet – other writers (and bloggers).
The point of the award is to help bring attention to blogs with fewer than 200 followers. There are some awesome blogs out in cyberspace that need public awareness. My picks for the Liebster Award go to five can’t be missed blogs.
All Inn Keepers Go To Heaven is a blog from my friend Virginia Cross and her husband Richard who have taken a sabbatical from cruising to fill the cruising kitty. But from the blog you can see they really are on just another adventure.
My second nominationWrite On The Water is a group blog by nine writers who prefer being rocked to sleep at night. I’m not the only traveling writer who’s chosen the high seas.
Jenny Hansen’s Blog Jenny writes with humor whether it be memoirs, women’s fiction, chick lit or short stories. She’s always looking for More Cowbell
You can find Kate Nolan at Kate Nolan Action Packed Paranormal Romance or her alter ego at Pots and Plots I love she can be in two places at once.
And last, but not least is my friend Mina Khan with Hot Curries and Cold Beer She’s a transplant to Texas raised in a multi-cultural family. Not just another food blog.
Congratulations one and all.
Congratulations Nancy on winning the Liebster award – so deserving. And for passing it on to five fantastic blogs! I can’t wait to check them all out.
I hear you on managing multiple roles. I was telling hubby on the weekend that sometimes I don’t feel like I have the right to complain about time management given that I don’t have children. I honestly have no idea how people work fulltime, raise children AND have a life. Wow.
I guess whether it’s children or living an active life, we all fill up our time with activities and responsibilities. I often have a tough time navigating it all, not over committing myself and putting much too much pressure to be perfect in each of my roles. My engine can certainly run on empty if I am not careful.
We try to really watch the energy gauge and when we find it getting low, take that necessary time to unwind and let go. I love how you say you are finding ways to really spend quality time with the people you love and that’s incredible and such a gift. GREAT post!
Thanks Natalie for the good wishes and kind words. Finding balance is still an evolving practice, but it’s coming easier, even as my writing life heats up.
Holy cow, Nancy! What a great way to come back from vacation…BLOG LOVE at Nancy’s place. Thank you so much!
I’ll just be floating through the week over at More Cowbell. I’ll be addressing this wonderful blog love on my Lovin’ Friday this week. 🙂
Welcome back and Congratulations. You deserve it.
Congrats on the award! It does feel selfish sometimes to take care of myself first. There are days where I just feel run-down and blah, and all I want to do is plop in front of the TV. My inner voice says I’m wasting precious writing time. I’m being unproductive. But even if I were to drag myself to my desk, my brain would not cooperate and give me coherent words to put on the page. My mom’s great–she always says I deserve to take a few hours, or a day. I work hard and it’s okay to take a break every once in a while. (If only she’d follow her own advice!)
Angela, been there, done that. It’s kind of like date night with the significant other. Once a month minimum. Why can’t we take artist’s dates as well?
Well done! Your blog is wonderful.
Thanks Marion!
A wonderful post, Nancy. Congradulations on winning this award. It is what brought me to your blog. If Diana Murdock gives it to you then there is no question you deserve it.
I’m an avid sailor– cruiser, not racer– and I do miss the life. My family spent many days sailing and our kids were so happy to be on the water. I even wrote a book that uses the boat as a character. Many kind words about how the main character relied on his boat to keep him sane have been written in reviews.
I do envy you. I’m a writer/farmer in Thailand now but sailing is in my blood.
I know I will enjoy your insights and look forward to reading all your post!
Welcome Aboard. It doesn’t appear as if you’ve lost the adventureous spirit. I’ll enjoy hearing from you and look forward to reading your book.